Dairy cheese in America can really be split into two categories- actual cheese and then cheese “food product”. I remember growing up and thinking that people who could afford the spray cheese in the can were really living large because that, my friends, showed both class and success.

From the minds of babes. Blorch.

One cheese-like food we never ate growing up was Velveeta. It was too expensive, so instead I consumed endless amounts of generic powdered cheese with elbow macaroni. When I moved out and went to college, I made several purchases to mark my independence and to break away into adulthood- I bought a car (stupid decision, college freshman Kris), I bought name brand cereal and I started eating copious amounts of Velveeta.

Note to those under the age of 18- Fruity Pebbles plus pasta covered in faux cheese is the recipes for your freshman 15. Just the thought of it makes me feel sick.

That all aside, recently I was reminiscing about those good ol’ college days and that intensely orange cheese and decided to remake it into something both vegan and healthy. I’d love to have the food scientists at Kraft take a gander at this orange beauty:


Butternut Squasheeta
1 medium butternut squash, roasted
2 tbsp. olive oil
1/4 cup nutritional yeast
1/2- 1 teas. lemon juice
1 teas. powdered onion
1/2 teas. powdered garlic
1/4 teas. salt
optional, but makes it much cheesier- 2 teas.- 1 tbsp. mild miso (depending on preference)
3/4- 1 cup water (to desired consistency)

Preheat oven to 375 and cut squash in half. Scoop out seeds and use 1 tbsp. of the oil to coat exposed flesh. Place cut side down on a baking sheet with edges and bake for 45 min to 1 hour, until tender.

Let squash cool for at least 20 minutes before removing skin from flesh. Place squash in food processor with all other ingredients except water and process for 30 seconds- 1 minute, until smooth. Add water 1/4 cup at a time, until desired consistency is reached. Keep sauce warm on stove, in a sauce pan, until use.

Serve warm over noodles or veggies. Store leftover sauce in a covered container in the fridge for up to a week.

Makes 4-6 servings, depending on size.

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14 Responses to ez cheese, no spray can required

  1. tekuno says:

    mmmm that looks soo good!

  2. Brandi says:

    Wow I would’ve never though of using butternut squash! What a great idea!

  3. Hope says:

    I love this post. You made me laugh so hard… “blorch” LOL. Cheese in a can is sooo nasty! I think the only thing worse is that processed meat in a can, blorch!!

  4. Courtney says:

    To funny–I used to want the squeeze/can cheese *so* badly growing up too! When I would go to friend’s houses who had it, I would seriously try to eat it at every opportunity (breakfast? Could I put some of that squeezy cheese on my toast, please? Sadly, I am NOT joking…). I begged my mom to buy it, but no luck. I have actually never had Velveeta, but I do shudder at the thought of that canned squeezy cheese…ugh. What was I thinking?!?
    Your version sounds and looks so much better! I can’t wait to try it :-)

    Courtney

    • Kris says:

      That is way too funny! A kindred teenage spirit!

      You never missed out on anything with Velveeta- vegan cheese tastes more like cheese than Velveeta does!

  5. Josiane says:

    Cheese in a spray can? I don’t think we have it here, thank goodness! Your no-can-required version, though, looks delicious!

    • Kris says:

      You are lucky if you’ve been able to defend your border against this atrocity. :) It was new and popular in the early/mid 90’s. It comes in a spray can like silly string, they even make it with bacon bits! It’s horrible, really.

  6. Mmmmm… processed cheese food substitute. This looks kah-razy! There are some omnivores in my life who will go nutso when they see this. :)

  7. Mel says:

    This is delicious! I can’t wait to give it to my daughters on veggies tonight. I followed everything except instead of olive oil, I used tahini. It is perfect. Thanks for sharing.

  8. Gilly says:

    I must say I’m enjoying your 100 best baking recipes, in fact the flax seed brownies are in the oven right now. I’m not sure about the fake cheese though. My husband is from MN I lived there for about 13 years and I found some of the cheese “products” very strange. However the one thing my husband misses from the USA (we are back in my native UK) is magical cheese powder from the Kraft boxes of mac and cheese! Bizarre. Though the horridest thing I ever saw on the shelves of a MN grocery store was mechanically separated beef fatty tissue which was in some “Meat Product.” Now that’s enough to make you turn vegan!!!